WHY A MAN DOES NOT WANT SEX: 6 QUESTIONS AND 5 REASONS

At first glance, this question seems like an oxymoron, an empty combination of incoherent words. But in a long-term relationship, you begin to understand that such a problem really exists, moreover, women face it everywhere.

Preliminary data

There are a lot of monotonous articles on the Internet on this topic. But do not read useless summaries of obvious causes (fatigue, venereal disease, poor lifestyle, adultery). This is all understandable, but the worst thing is that it does not depend on us in any way, and nothing can be done about it.

We cannot know what is going on in the soul of a loved one. Unless he honestly tells him what’s bugging him. It will be much more useful to analyze your own behavior and work on your mistakes. In the end, you are already an adult woman and no one will be involved in your development except yourself.

The infantile form of behavior: “it’s not my fault, he started it all,” should have remained in the 6th grade in the backyard of the school, where your mother scolded you for bad behavior. The only way to change anything is to start with yourself, the good old “if you want to change the world, start with yourself.” Therefore, stop being offended and blaming him, think, maybe you are doing something wrong

To understand this topic, you can not look for ready-made answers, on the contrary, you should ask yourself a list of questions and thoughtfully answer them.

Do you consider his preferences in sex?

Since the topic of sex is almost constantly taboo in our society, few people dare to speak openly about their preferences, even to their partners. A man may be afraid to discourage you with his desire. From such trifles, just, distrust of the partner is born. Therefore, if you have not had such a conversation yet, do not be shy. In the right setting and with carefully chosen words, try to find out from him what he wants, what else you can give him. At the same time, it is important that he understands that you are serious and that you do not brand him with the seal “pervert” by running up the flights of stairs, bypassing the steps.

Do you really get peak pleasure from your sex?

The great thing about sex is seeing how nice your partner is. Isn’t it true that nothing pleases so much as to see his pleasure from you, your body, your maximum possible intimacy? And it’s the same with him.

When a man sees that a woman completely dissolves in him, discarding everything in the world. He understands that it is he who makes her experience breathtaking pleasure, this is at least flattering. If he loves you, then this fact generally brings him happiness.

So, how honest are you with him about your preferences? After all, if you do not get total satisfaction from your sex life, why did you get the idea that he gets it? Maybe that’s why he doesn’t want you because he doesn’t understand why you need it if you don’t give yourself to him for real?

How immersed are you in the process?

Now the phrase “to be here and now” is heard from all sides, in the context of sexual life it is much easier to understand it than in other areas. It’s hard to have sex with a woman who is mentally completing a work report or vacuuming on the balcony.

It is disrespectful to the partner to switch to anything during sex.

I’m not talking about a sudden important phone call that came at the most inopportune moment. It’s just that some women during intercourse may well ask themselves the question: “did you forget to buy the powder? Otherwise, I wanted to wash it later, ”or“ I just can’t forget about our conversation a couple of days ago. Sometimes it comes to the point of absurdity and, nevertheless, sad but true. Hack it on your nose, carve it on a rock or burn it on a plank

Never switch during sex to anything other than maybe another position.

Do you criticize him?

At first, I wanted to call this section “Do you often criticize him?”, But then I realized that often or not, it doesn’t matter. You can’t criticize your man at all. No one in their right mind wants to fuck their grumpy mom. Better make friends with her and let her teach him the mind of the mind on your behalf, as the speaker of your women’s party. And you are his woman – you must love him, nourish him, and where without gray-haired wisdom – cherish and cherish. If he doesn’t do something the way you want: firstly, remember that in addition to you in this pair there is also him and his opinion, and secondly, without bringing the situation to the point of absurdity, think about what he can’t read your mind.

Say how you would like and ask if he can do it. If it can – class, if it can’t – how important is this something to you? If it’s not particularly important – don’t take the bad into your head. If it’s very important, break up with him. And to sit still and accumulate anger until it breaks through, and you start to take out his brain, the most stupid thing you can do. Criticism kills any good relationship and sexual in the first place. After all, you begin to level him as a man.

How many of you are in bed?

The sexual desire that you experience before intercourse is strictly directed at the subject. Foreplay before sexual intercourse – in fact, any stay alone, because you can have sex at any moment. Therefore, you do not need to relax to a state where, in a fit of pleasure from communication and intellectual/spiritual intimacy with him, you begin to talk about your previous lover(s). Even if you say good things (it’s generally moronic to say bad things), you thereby give part of your total time to the previous partner, even if only for discussion, but still. And no man wants to hear about how beautiful another is, it’s better to drink beer with friends than such foreplay.

People who don’t play games

When I first became interested in sex, my girlfriends and I decided to go to a sex shop. See what’s what. In the department of costumes for sexual games, I was seized with horror and disgust. Almost like pride and prejudice, only worse.

Flashy, tasteless outfits made of cheap fabrics, with terrible plastic inserts, nets and all. I couldn’t understand how people can wear this? Does anyone really like to take it off, someone?

Now, when I understand that they bring to stores what is cheaper to buy in Turkey and China, but do not focus on the tastes of people. After this epiphany, it became easier to relate to games better. I’m not saying that the French maid costume will make him want you more, more often, longer. It’s just that if you start sex not on the same note as always, it will become more interesting. Games begin with the head and communication, with the mood that you set. And not with latex and whips. Moreover, if you, not being natural in this role, put on some kind of saddle, you risk scaring him, not even making him laugh.

Sex is great, in principle there can be no problems in it unless it is with health. There are challenges in sex. And if you are a good girl and solve them, your teacher will definitely encourage you, well, and satisfy you.

Why a man does not want sex: 5 reasons

There may be several important reasons for a man not wanting sex, and not all of them relate to some of your problems within the relationship:

1. He’s under stress. A man can also get tired at work, and this will certainly affect the quality of his sex life. Suggest slowing down and doing stress reduction activities such as yoga, exercise, or going on vacation.
2. Bad habits. A decrease in libido can occur if a man abuses alcohol and cigarettes. In addition, drug addiction can cause a strong blow to potency.
3. Birth of a child. The birth of a child can affect not only a woman but also a man. The partner can “fixate” on the child, worry too much about him.
4. Age. Well, there is nothing to say here: as men age, they become less active in bed.
5. Mental problems. Unresolved mental problems can become a problem for a man in bed. If he had a trauma in the past, it is worth sending a man to work it out with a psychologist.