DARING to take the first step to travel alone is a moment of life for anyone who travels. However, it is a reality that, being a woman, all those fears, those doubts, those images of violence, chaos, and destruction that pass through the mind are accentuated. Everything is double.
But there is nothing to throw back an authentic wanderlust spirit, be it a man or a woman. It’s about applying some tips and tricks to make some situations much easier to handle.
1. Common sense
Common sense is basic, here, there, and in Beijing. In my own city, it does not occur to me to go out alone to explore not very busy areas at night. In fact, I take such precautions, especially in my own city. I am from Algeciras, Cádiz, so when they tell me that if I go alone to such a country, that it is extremely dangerous… well, it makes me want to laugh.
Trust your instincts, analyze the place where you are to assess the situation, its environment, and the landscape. If you act, don’t let anything catch you off guard. It is not about going in fear, but awake. Enjoy to the fullest, but do not put yourself in risky situations. Unfortunately, we live in a macho world, it is simply a matter of accepting it and learning to cope.
2. Make allies
Establish friendly relationships with the locals: receptionists, shop assistants, tour guides, etc. If at any given moment you find yourself in trouble, you will always have someone to turn to explain the situation. I assure you that taking refuge in a store —for example— from an uncomfortable situation gives great peace of mind.
One afternoon I spent the entire afternoon at a little fruit stand in San José, Costa Rica, with a woman who could very well be my grandmother. Doña Rosa understood the situation right away: there was a guy I would meet when I turned every corner, and at every encounter she would look me up and down, making me feel uncomfortable and violent. At the time of being with her getting fine with juices, one of her children was already talking to the guy, whom I never saw again.
3. Start small and easy
The best way to start traveling alone is to go slowly, gently, gently. Do not launch yourself from 0 to a 3-month solo trip to an unknown continent, because the change may be too abrupt. I recommend you start with a weekend or long weekend in a nearby and easy destination. When I say “easy,” I think of a place that is culturally close, with tourist infrastructure, where it is not difficult for you to move or deal with the accommodation. And, of course, where there are no armed conflicts or risks of natural disasters.
It is not the same to go alone in Guatemala or Nepal than to go as a princess to Budapest. My first solo foray was to Croatia for a week. The “worst” thing was that I felt very strange at mealtimes, but very free and “connected” with myself the rest of the time. From that trip, the only thing my body asked for was MORE.
4. Wherever you go, do what you see
Finding out about the destination we are going to in advance will always make you enjoy the trip much more. Knowing the meaning of certain words, certain customs, knowing its history, radically changes the perception of a place. If you are also a woman, it is especially important to know about customs, religion and the role of women in society. These data are very important to not commit disrespect and attract attention.
For example, in some countries it is very frowned upon to touch people. Nobody told me that it was not okay to touch the head of Buddhist monks, and every time I saw a child I would die of love, but they seemed to not like it at all… Checking the appropriate clothing to enter public places and religious temples is also very important. I’m not one to wear miniskirts, but a tank top yes. So I usually wear a large scarf, pareo type, which serves both to cover my shoulders, and to improvise a long skirt in nothing.
5. Wear discreet and comfortable clothes
This point connects with the previous one. Within the customs of a place, the dress code is important. There are places where wearing very tight clothes or clothes that show a lot is not well seen. And since we also agree that attracting too much attention is not a good idea, so dress comfortably, with less garish colors. The more similar views to the locals, the better.
As a general rule of thumb when traveling, I always recommend putting comfort ahead of posture. First because this one is very lazy, and second because it takes up too much space in the backpack. I have seen girls with heels and heart-stopping platforms among the pyramids of Teotihuacán. I assumed that they were looking for the party in the pre-Columbian club… rather dead than simple.
6. Have copies of everything
Passport, visa, DNI and medical insurance, along with money, are the most important papers that you are going to take with you on the trip. Since money cannot be cloned (no, right?), it has a copy of everything else.
Carry the originals in your wallet, with a padlock, and therest, with an extra deposit of money, in a separate and safe place. I keep a ticket here and a ticket there, inside the tube of toothpaste, under the sole of the shoe, in rollers inside an empty tampax, in my socks…
7. Room with latch
Check that your room has a lock, and that it works! If it doesn’t go well, you can ask for a room change. This is one of the measures that, personally, helps me rest a little better. Although I have experienced situations of people trying to sneak through my window, in the absence of a door… But luckily they did not go for aggressive purposes, but rather for holidays.
If I stay in a hostel, I ask if they have rooms for women. If they only have mixed rooms, I choose the top bunks as they are more “private” and less intrusive.
8. Always carry a padlock
Both to close the backpack and to block lockers and cabinets as well as for the door of your room -if it does not have a latch-, a padlock is always very useful. For me it is a must, just like earplugs, but the latter for other reasons that have nothing to do with female safe Book the first nights of accommodatio
9. Book the first nights of accommodation
Even if you later travel as you go, drawing on recommendations en route and spontaneity, reserve the first few nights. Whether you stay in hostels, Airbnb or Couchsurf, check the reviews carefully, especially from other women. Once you land and get used to the environment and cultural codes of your destination, you can start to “let go”.
10. Move during the day
Try to always move during the day, take advantage of the bright hours. To begin with, make sure that your transport —plane, train, bus— always arrives at its destination in daylight. In this way, you will not be an easy target carrying your backpack or dragging your trolley alone at night through unknown streets.
I don’t even want to remember when coming from Costa Rica to Panama, the bus left me in the middle of the night and the Pan-American highway. I had to take a taxi to the bus station, which didn’t feel safer at night. Nothing serious happened, but I was tense for hours. Since then, I’ve been much more careful with schedules.
11. The classic fake ring trick
You are not married nor do you want to have or ever had, but how well the ring looks on your finger. Which is a lie, yes, but only you know that. There is no better way to “scare away” guys who get annoying or to quickly finish the questionnaire of the thousand classic questions: are you traveling alone? Are you married? Do you have children? And your boyfriend?
In addition to the ring, have a good life story as a couple prepared. I have already lost count of how many husbands I have come to have in a single life. Some of them I divorced, others died in accidents, poor people, and many of them “were yet to come.”
Lying is ugly, but uglier is stealing.
12. Keep your people informed
When I started traveling, about 20 years ago, I remember arriving at each destination and looking for the phone booth or inserting coins like a slot machine into hostel phones to let my mother know I was okay. Now that was hard work, and expensive!
Nowadays, with social networks, it is very easy to be located almost at any time. But perhaps it is not a bad idea, when you travel alone, to keep your family informed of your movements, with more specific data: hotel where you are staying, photo of the route you take every day; even, photo of the taxis you take.
It will be rare not to find accommodation and places with Wi-Fi, here and there, so contacting will not be complicated. But if you want to be absolutely sure, you can buy a local prepaid SIM.
13. Nobody has to know
No one has to know the details of your trip: if you are traveling alone or accompanied, where you sleep, where you are going, or what kind of luggage you are carrying. If they ask you, you can say that you are staying with a friend or relative or that you live in the city, as if to make that person understand that you know the place very well and are almost local. If fate does not lend itself to this joke, you can comment that you are with your partner, but at that moment you walk alone.
Look, make up whatever you want, but don’t give any specifics unless you feel completely confident. I once made the mistake of talking a lot and, although I didn’t have any serious mishap, I did have to endure the “insistence” at the door of the hostel.
14. Those days when you feel “happy” to be a woman
Yes, yes, super happy. You smell the things that don’t smell, you love the things you don’t, you see magical rainbows coming out from behind every corner… come on! The rule comes every month to make our existence a little uncomfortable. And no, you don’t see life in pink or smell like chocolate cake and strawberries. The rule is a pain and, to travel, much more still. Going with the rule in certain countries can be not only uncomfortable, but directly a big setback. Let’s see, who is the beauty who finds some tampons in the middle of the mountains of Nepal? Who is the bonica that takes hygiene one hundred percent to the point on the way to Machu Picchu along the Inca Trail? Three days of trekking “feeling happy to be a woman”. I assure you that I did not feel happy at all…
I am in favor of reducing luggage as much as possible and avoiding superfluous objects, but to that, friends, you have to pay attention because a quick trip annoys you. Although it is not the object that most convinces me, the truth is that when traveling the menstrual cup is much more practical than pads or tampons. I would also add some vaginal suppositories and other remedies against all kinds of infections, much more common than we think, to the women’s medicine cabinet.
And, while we’re at it, don’t forget the contraceptive par excellence: the condom. Not only to avoid unwanted pregnancies, but also sexually transmitted diseases. A lipstick is superfluous -although pretty-, but everything else I recommend is basic, a sign of respect and health towards you and your body.
