My wedding has not died down yet, and I am already hatching a plan for how I will win a ticket to Z-games and go on vacation there … with my best friend Natasha. And at the Atlasweekend festival, where the drawing took place, we were with her. I am separated from my husband and two fat cats, she is from her husband, three sons, and a long mischievous dog.

No, we have good husbands, warm relations in families, and we sincerely love animals. It’s just that women need time for themselves, and there is so little of it in the family. More precisely, the larger the family, the less time. All these eternal “Oh, I’ll run to the store, we’ve run out of washing powder” (I myself), “Mom, what should I wear” (Natasha once from each son), “Meow, I miss you, I want to eat and on my hands” (Filya insistently demands, Baksik silently stands nearby, implying that everything is the same for him), “woof, but it’s time for me to go for a walk” (Chester puffs nervously and fusses at the door, pretending to be extremely patient), “darling, what we have something to eat” (my husband, Natashka’s husband and all the husbands in the world). Well, you yourself understand everything.

Therefore, I firmly believe that the vacation should be spent separately, or at least part of the vacation, the spouses should rest apart. And then those with whom I recklessly shared this thought begin to frighten me, “How ?! Do not try to leave your husband alone or let him go somewhere! And what if he meets someone, you yourself create a comfortable environment for him to betray. I go to relax and take a breath on a popular psychological forum and from there the headlines “Conflict with my husband: he wants to go rafting alone”, “Total control over my husband: I’m afraid he will leave me”, “A man is going on vacation alone” hit me in the eye: what should I do?”.

And in the discussion, “caring” gossips of all ages begin to give advice from “drive him in the neck” to “don’t let one go or put a surveillance program on your iPhone. ” And they add horror stories in the spirit of “But my neighbor Masha’s husband just went to the sea alone, and returned from there with his mistress, left Masha alone with two children, three cats, and one dog.” I just remember Vasily, from the unforgettable film “Love and Pigeons”, who went to the sea, drank a cocktail, and immediately, naive and lukewarm, fell into the tenacious hands of Raisa Zakharova.

For some reason, the husband is perceived by women as such a figure who is only looking for ways to go “to the left”. That is, I’m going on vacation to relax, and my husband goes on vacation to certainly look for young and not very virgins for unbridled beach sex. And if I am not around, he will quickly take off the ring and that’s it – he is “forever young, forever drunk.”

I became very sad. No, not from the thought of how my husband will tear himself away in the arms of tanned young maidens if I leave him alone. By the way, for some reason, no one said that my cats can cheat on me too? With someone who will feed them more often and tastier. And the children, Natashka’s children, will not cheat on her if she spends a week away from them?

For some reason, the husband is perceived by women as such a figure who is only looking for ways to go “to the left”. That is, I’m going on vacation to relax, and my husband goes on vacation to certainly look for young and not very virgins for unbridled beach sex. And if I am not around, he will quickly take off the ring and that’s it – he is “forever young, forever drunk.”

I became very sad. No, not from the thought of how my husband will tear himself away in the arms of tanned young maidens if I leave him alone. By the way, for some reason, no one said that my cats can cheat on me too? With someone who will feed them more often and tastier. And the children, Natashka’s children, will not cheat on her if she spends a week away from them?

It’s sad what women think about themselves and about men: if I loosen my grip and control, he will leave. And then their whole life comes down to “keep your husband.” I know a lot of couples who have vacationed together and cheated on each other anyway. And I know examples where a man spent the main part of the year with his mistress, and, on the contrary, went on vacation with his wife and children.

Of course, it will be painful and difficult for me if I find out about the betrayal, but this is definitely not something that I can control. When we made the decision to live together, my husband asked if I was jealous. I answered, “no, I will not check your phone, monitor social networks, or require a minute-by-minute report of where you were and with whom.” He again asked, “what will happen if I cheat on you?” “You’ll pack up and leave, ” I said. And that’s all I can do – mark the border of the unacceptable, and then the choice of another person: to cross it or not.

So, Z-games, if anything, then I’m with you. Without a husband and two fat cats, but with a friend Natasha. And if during our absence, cats, husbands, or a long mischievous dog cheat on us, we will at least have a good rest.

1. Let the good times roll. Dial-up the fun, because it helps you exercise longer and harder – and it puts the kibosh on dreading workouts. Crank up the music and dance like nobody’s watching. Take a Zumba or pole-dancing class. Play tag with your kids.

2. Go social. Social media can boost your motivation and keep you on track. Announce your fitness goals on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. “You’ll be surprised how many people help,” Ramsay says. They’ll rally behind you, offer tips, and steer you away from missing a workout.

3. Make the world your gym. Do stretches in the grocery line. Do ballet moves while pumping gas. Take the stairs. Sitting in traffic? Squeeze your lower abs, then release. “You’ll be amazed at how much you can develop your core strength while driving,” Ramsay says.

4. Pump yourself up. Positive self-talk can boost your motivation. Look in the mirror and observe how strong your muscles are. Applaud yourself for getting fit. Recognize the goals you’ve met.

5. Break up your workouts. If you dread a long workout, break it into small chunks. “Five minutes here, 5 minutes there — it all adds up,” Ramsay says. Stretch for 10 minutes before your morning shower. Take a brisk, 20-minute walk at lunch. Lift weights while you wait for your pasta water to boil.

6. Stretch. It makes you more flexible, relieves muscle tension, and improves posture. It also helps you tune in to your body, Ramsay says. No time? No problem. Stretch while watching TV or lying in bed.

7. Say no to sports drinks. “Unless you’re a pro athlete, they’re not necessary,” he says. “I see it all the time at the gym.” Sports drinks are loaded with extra calories. Try water with lemon instead.

8. Pair cardio with weight resistance for fast results. “For my celebrity clients who need quick results, I combine cardio and resistance training,” Ramsay says. While pedaling on an exercise bike, add 30-second sets of bicep curls and overhead tricep extensions. Add bursts of shoulder presses while you walk on the treadmill.

9. Embrace the next level. Don’t balk at super-challenging workouts. They’re tough for a reason: They work. When Ramsay asked actor Cheyenne Jackson which exercise he dreaded most, he said burpees. “So I put him on a 30-minute burpee routine, five times a week,” Ramsay says. “In 6 weeks, he was a different man.”

10. Challenge yourself. Step it up. Work out 5 minutes longer. Raise the incline level on your treadmill. Go for a few extra repetitions. It makes a difference. “We should always be pushing ourselves,” Ramsay says. But if it feels too intense or you don’t have enough breath to hold a conversation, slow down.

Generally, when we start planning our solo trip, the first thing that comes to mind is long trips to super exotic destinations on the other side of the planet. However, it doesn’t always have to be that way. In Spain, there are a large number of cities that are perfect for debuting in the art of traveling alone .

Discover the best destinations to travel alone for the first time in Spain. Thousands of tourists are attracted by our climate, gastronomy, and cultural heritage, why not take advantage of your first solo trip to also enjoy these wonders? Although we know that choosing the perfect destination is something very personal, when choosing destinations to travel alone for the first time in Spain, it is important to take into account some important aspects. For example, if you are afraid of feeling alone, we recommend staying in hostels or hostels where you can spend time in the common areas.

As for the ideal means of transport to reach these destinations to travel alone for the first time in Spain, forget about the car. Public transport is the best option for traveling alone. Buses, for example, are the best place to unwind and meet new people with whom you probably even share a destination ( tips for traveling alone by bus ).

Did you know that Spain was chosen as the best destination to travel alone in 2019? According to the “Danger Index for Women” ranking, carried out by Asher and Lyric Fergusson, Spain is the safest alternative for women traveling alone. Among the 50 countries analyzed, it has the lowest levels of attempted homicides against women, non-partner sexual violence, legal discrimination, the wage gap, and violence against feminism.

Barcelona

Barcelona is one of the most visited destinations in the world, and we are not surprised. Its multiculturalism, beauty, and great cultural and leisure offer make it a mandatory stop on any trip to Spain. Why is it one of the best destinations to travel alone for the first time in Spain? It is practically impossible to get bored and the possibilities of meeting new people are endless.

Lion

Perhaps it is not one of the most touristic cities in the country, but that is only an advantage to be able to enjoy all its charms with relative tranquility. For example, its Cathedral is one of the most impressive examples of Gothic art in all of Spain. If you like tapas and good wine, be sure to stop by the Barrio Húmedo.

Bilbao

Bilbao is said to be the perfect mix between modernity and tradition. The fusion of modern architecture and traditional Basque culture makes it an essential destination for lovers of design and culture. In addition, it is one of the tourist references both nationally and internationally and is 100% prepared for tourists. Surely you will not be alone!

Grenade

Granada is a truly monumental historical city. A large part of the city is part of the UNESCO World Heritage Site. For example, the Alhambra, the Cathedral, the Royal Chapel, or the Cartuja Monastery, among many others. It is a perfect city to get lost and open to all kinds of tourists.

Madrid

Madrid is known worldwide for the friendliness of its people, and therefore a perfect destination to travel alone for the first time in Spain. It is an easy city to get around and very popular so it will be easy to find many other women traveling alone. Although large cities are not exempt from risks, it can be said that Madrid is a very safe city.

Valencia

Valencia is a very safe city and therefore one of the best destinations to travel alone for the first time in Spain. Its 300 days of sunshine a year make it ideal to explore it on foot or by bicycle. Its Mediterranean gastronomy, its beaches, and its great traditional festivals will not leave you a minute free. In addition, the warmth and hospitality of the Valencians will make you feel at home.

Seville

It is one of the great tourist attractions in the country and, without a doubt, one of the best destinations to travel alone for the first time in Spain. Seville is a city of great panoramic views, rooftops, and terraces. Its importance throughout history has bequeathed a heritage of great cultural value. Enjoy the city with all five senses and let yourself go!

There is a lot of talk about women’s self-defense on the Internet. To some, it seems useless, and someone believes that it is self-defense skills that can help at a decisive moment. Blogger Alexander Drusakov, a self-defense expert, also spoke about this.

Alexander commented on Jocelyn Hollander’s research on the effectiveness of self-defense in preventing sexual assault.

“The topic of abuse and the fight against it inevitably leads to conversations about ways to resist violence, including sexual violence. And as a result, people here are conditionally divided into three groups, ”

Views on women’s self-defense

• FIRST GROUP People who do not understand the topic of abuse and violence, who do not understand why this happens in modern society. This includes victimblamers and people who do not take off their white coats.

• SECOND GROUP People who share the views of the second wave of feminism. In their opinion, self-defense is necessary. These are: the ability to draw boundaries, to voice their desires and unwillingnesses, and in the case of harassment or an attempted rape, the use of physical skills to stop the aggressor.

• THIRD GROUP Those who share the views of the third wave of feminism. In their opinion, self-defense is not only about shifting the focus to the victim and subsequent victim-blaming, but also instilling a false sense of security. In addition, self-defence does not solve the root problem of violence – a social structure in which the man is the avatar of activity and conquest, and the woman is the avatar of passivity and submission. Simply put: “ Teach men not to rape, get away from the victims! »

“In my opinion, as an expert in self-defense, the ideas of the second and third waves should not interfere with each other, because they solve the same problem from different angles. The second wave is more about tactics and “right here and now”, and the third is about strategy and “later”. At the same time, self-defense also affects the strategic perspective, because each act of successful self-defense models the behavior of the aggressors in the long term, while the absence of resistance reinforces the “it’s possible” model.

— wrote the blogger.

It’s no secret to anyone – the blame for aggression lies solely with the aggressor and the society that has created a value system that allows such an attitude.

“We are for every woman to get more chances to live to a bright society with the least possible amount of traumatic experience. And self-defense classes directly affect this, because they work with violence before it happened (and in every sense, but more on that later). The focus of self-defense is on prevention,

– emphasizes Alexander Drusakov.

Why is self-defense left out of the fight against sexual violence for the third wave of feminism and many organizations that fight against sexual violence against women?

“To assess its effectiveness and to organize effective courses, people often lack expertise in the field of female self-defense AND AT THE SAME TIME, taking into account the specifics along with knowledge of social psychology”,

Alexander writes.

He also brings the theses that are often appealed against women’s self-defense and debunks them from the point of view of a self-defense expert.

Problems of women’s self-defense: myths and facts

What are the problems with the rhetoric against women’s self-defense and its usefulness in the fight against harassment and sexual violence? We quote Alexander Drusakov.

“Ineffective”

Many mistake women’s self-defense for the ability to fight with hands and feet, when this is only a narrow part, which is not always used and not in full. Those who do not understand the specifics do not take into account soft techniques, drawing boundaries, shouting, involving witnesses. But the main thing is to debunk the myth of female helplessness, on which absurd statements grow, such as the fact that a woman of the same height and weight as a man is 7 times weaker than him.

“Situational”

For some reason, everything came down to the fact that either self-defense should be universal and effective, like a lightning strike at an aggressor, directed by the power of thought, or it should be useless. The main idea is missing: self-defense is always about increasing chances, it is not a panacea. And yes, different techniques and strategies are suitable for each situation. Some are highly specialized, some are relatively universal. But even these work in 80% of cases, even with ideal long-term development. Why should we throw away a mobile phone if it is inconvenient for them to hammer in nails, and a hammer if it cannot access the Internet? Everything has its time and occasion.

“Victimblaming Again”

The third wave says that any promotion of self-defense is an attempt to shift responsibility to the victim. I didn’t go to work – it’s my own fault. As if it gives a man the idea that if a woman didn’t fight him off, then either she wanted to, or she didn’t learn how to fight well, and this is not his problem. The only problem is that for the rapist, the problem of the victim is never a problem.

“Self-Victimblaming”

Self-defense opponents say that a woman who learned self-defense but could not fight off her rapist will blame herself for what happened because she was confident in herself, but could not avoid trouble. This is refuted by empirical research (Bart & O’Brien, 1985; Rozee & Koss, 2001), and they say that rape victims who engage in self-defense, at least, blame themselves no more than those who do not, and often even less. This can be explained by the fact that when you do your best, you have nothing to regret.

“Women will not defend themselves from acquaintances”

For “their own” there are soft techniques that are quite effective. Plus recognition of situations that can result in violence. Soft techniques are psychologically easier to apply. There are studies that say that women trained in self-defense feel equally confident with strangers and acquaintances if they need to defend themselves.

 “Self-defense does not solve the root problem”

In other words, it does not teach the rapist not to rape. But let’s think about what will teach an aggressive man who is ready to break through the boundaries of women sexually – a thoughtful article that rape is bad and that women suffer from it? Or is it still the loss of erection during harassment, fear from sharp commands, harsh actions, or even pain from a broken knee?

Hollander writes that for women in the self-defense group, the very number of unpleasant situations in which they found themselves decreased. Separately, it was noted that it remains to be investigated separately due to which particular factors this improvement occurs – non-verbal signals, increased self-confidence and self-confidence, avoidance and suppression of situations before they lead to unpleasant development, or all together.

But there is nothing to throw back an authentic wanderlust spirit, be it a man or a woman. It’s about applying some tips and tricks to make some situations much easier to handle.

1. Common sense

Common sense is basic, here, there, and in Beijing. In my own city, it does not occur to me to go out alone to explore not very busy areas at night. In fact, I take such precautions, especially in my own city. I am from Algeciras, Cádiz, so when they tell me that if I go alone to such a country, that it is extremely dangerous… well, it makes me want to laugh.

Trust your instincts, analyze the place where you are to assess the situation, its environment, and the landscape. If you act, don’t let anything catch you off guard. It is not about going in fear, but awake. Enjoy to the fullest, but do not put yourself in risky situations. Unfortunately, we live in a macho world, it is simply a matter of accepting it and learning to cope.

2. Make allies

Establish friendly relationships with the locals: receptionists, shop assistants, tour guides, etc. If at any given moment you find yourself in trouble, you will always have someone to turn to explain the situation. I assure you that taking refuge in a store —for example— from an uncomfortable situation gives great peace of mind.

One afternoon I spent the entire afternoon at a little fruit stand in San José, Costa Rica, with a woman who could very well be my grandmother. Doña Rosa understood the situation right away: there was a guy I would meet when I turned every corner, and at every encounter she would look me up and down, making me feel uncomfortable and violent. At the time of being with her getting fine with juices, one of her children was already talking to the guy, whom I never saw again.

3. Start small and easy

The best way to start traveling alone is to go slowly, gently, gently. Do not launch yourself from 0 to a 3-month solo trip to an unknown continent, because the change may be too abrupt. I recommend you start with a weekend or long weekend in a nearby and easy destination. When I say “easy,” I think of a place that is culturally close, with tourist infrastructure, where it is not difficult for you to move or deal with the accommodation. And, of course, where there are no armed conflicts or risks of natural disasters.

It is not the same to go alone in Guatemala or Nepal than to go as a princess to Budapest. My first solo foray was to Croatia for a week. The “worst” thing was that I felt very strange at mealtimes, but very free and “connected” with myself the rest of the time. From that trip, the only thing my body asked for was MORE.

4. Wherever you go, do what you see

Finding out about the destination we are going to in advance will always make you enjoy the trip much more. Knowing the meaning of certain words, certain customs, knowing its history, radically changes the perception of a place. If you are also a woman, it is especially important to know about customs, religion and the role of women in society. These data are very important to not commit disrespect and attract attention.

For example, in some countries it is very frowned upon to touch people. Nobody told me that it was not okay to touch the head of Buddhist monks, and every time I saw a child I would die of love, but they seemed to not like it at all… Checking the appropriate clothing to enter public places and religious temples is also very important. I’m not one to wear miniskirts, but a tank top yes. So I usually wear a large scarf, pareo type, which serves both to cover my shoulders, and to improvise a long skirt in nothing.

5. Wear discreet and comfortable clothes

This point connects with the previous one. Within the customs of a place, the dress code is important. There are places where wearing very tight clothes or clothes that show a lot is not well seen. And since we also agree that attracting too much attention is not a good idea, so dress comfortably, with less garish colors. The more similar views to the locals, the better.

As a general rule of thumb when traveling, I always recommend putting comfort ahead of posture. First because this one is very lazy, and second because it takes up too much space in the backpack. I have seen girls with heels and heart-stopping platforms among the pyramids of Teotihuacán. I assumed that they were looking for the party in the pre-Columbian club… rather dead than simple.

6. Have copies of everything

Passport, visa, DNI and medical insurance, along with money, are the most important papers that you are going to take with you on the trip. Since money cannot be cloned (no, right?), it has a copy of everything else.

Carry the originals in your wallet, with a padlock, and therest, with an extra deposit of money, in a separate and safe place. I keep a ticket here and a ticket there, inside the tube of toothpaste, under the sole of the shoe, in rollers inside an empty tampax, in my socks…

7. Room with latch

Check that your room has a lock, and that it works! If it doesn’t go well, you can ask for a room change. This is one of the measures that, personally, helps me rest a little better. Although I have experienced situations of people trying to sneak through my window, in the absence of a door… But luckily they did not go for aggressive purposes, but rather for holidays.

If I stay in a hostel, I ask if they have rooms for women. If they only have mixed rooms, I choose the top bunks as they are more “private” and less intrusive.

8. Always carry a padlock

Both to close the backpack and to block lockers and cabinets as well as for the door of your room -if it does not have a latch-, a padlock is always very useful. For me it is a must, just like earplugs, but the latter for other reasons that have nothing to do with female safe Book the first nights of accommodatio

9. Book the first nights of accommodation

Even if you later travel as you go, drawing on recommendations en route and spontaneity, reserve the first few nights. Whether you stay in hostels, Airbnb or Couchsurf, check the reviews carefully, especially from other women. Once you land and get used to the environment and cultural codes of your destination, you can start to “let go”.

10. Move during the day

Try to always move during the day, take advantage of the bright hours. To begin with, make sure that your transport —plane, train, bus— always arrives at its destination in daylight. In this way, you will not be an easy target carrying your backpack or dragging your trolley alone at night through unknown streets.

I don’t even want to remember when coming from Costa Rica to Panama, the bus left me in the middle of the night and the Pan-American highway. I had to take a taxi to the bus station, which didn’t feel safer at night. Nothing serious happened, but I was tense for hours. Since then, I’ve been much more careful with schedules.

11. The classic fake ring trick

You are not married nor do you want to have or ever had, but how well the ring looks on your finger. Which is a lie, yes, but only you know that. There is no better way to “scare away” guys who get annoying or to quickly finish the questionnaire of the thousand classic questions: are you traveling alone? Are you married? Do you have children? And your boyfriend?

In addition to the ring, have a good life story as a couple prepared. I have already lost count of how many husbands I have come to have in a single life. Some of them I divorced, others died in accidents, poor people, and many of them “were yet to come.”

Lying is ugly, but uglier is stealing.

12. Keep your people informed

When I started traveling, about 20 years ago, I remember arriving at each destination and looking for the phone booth or inserting coins like a slot machine into hostel phones to let my mother know I was okay. Now that was hard work, and expensive!

Nowadays, with social networks, it is very easy to be located almost at any time. But perhaps it is not a bad idea, when you travel alone, to keep your family informed of your movements, with more specific data: hotel where you are staying, photo of the route you take every day; even, photo of the taxis you take.

It will be rare not to find accommodation and places with Wi-Fi, here and there, so contacting will not be complicated. But if you want to be absolutely sure, you can buy a local prepaid SIM.

13. Nobody has to know

No one has to know the details of your trip: if you are traveling alone or accompanied, where you sleep, where you are going, or what kind of luggage you are carrying. If they ask you, you can say that you are staying with a friend or relative or that you live in the city, as if to make that person understand that you know the place very well and are almost local. If fate does not lend itself to this joke, you can comment that you are with your partner, but at that moment you walk alone.

Look, make up whatever you want, but don’t give any specifics unless you feel completely confident. I once made the mistake of talking a lot and, although I didn’t have any serious mishap, I did have to endure the “insistence” at the door of the hostel.

14. Those days when you feel “happy” to be a woman

Yes, yes, super happy. You smell the things that don’t smell, you love the things you don’t, you see magical rainbows coming out from behind every corner… come on! The rule comes every month to make our existence a little uncomfortable. And no, you don’t see life in pink or smell like chocolate cake and strawberries. The rule is a pain and, to travel, much more still. Going with the rule in certain countries can be not only uncomfortable, but directly a big setback. Let’s see, who is the beauty who finds some tampons in the middle of the mountains of Nepal? Who is the bonica that takes hygiene one hundred percent to the point on the way to Machu Picchu along the Inca Trail? Three days of trekking “feeling happy to be a woman”. I assure you that I did not feel happy at all…

I am in favor of reducing luggage as much as possible and avoiding superfluous objects, but to that, friends, you have to pay attention because a quick trip annoys you. Although it is not the object that most convinces me, the truth is that when traveling the menstrual cup is much more practical than pads or tampons. I would also add some vaginal suppositories and other remedies against all kinds of infections, much more common than we think, to the women’s medicine cabinet.

And, while we’re at it, don’t forget the contraceptive par excellence: the condom. Not only to avoid unwanted pregnancies, but also sexually transmitted diseases. A lipstick is superfluous -although pretty-, but everything else I recommend is basic, a sign of respect and health towards you and your body.

The type of applicant communication can play a decisive role in the competition for skilled workers. Hitting the right note with candidates is a big step forward. HR managers can find out what is important here.

The forces in recruiting have shifted. Whereas in the past it was the companies that selected the applicants, today it is often the other way around. If specialists now register on their own initiative or in response to a job advertisement and are then shortlisted, they usually have the upper hand. This is due to the continuing lack of qualified personnel for demanding and managerial functions.

In addition, candidates often gather detailed information about their potential new employer before submitting their application. For example, they study online evaluation portals on which companies are evaluated by current and former employees. Or they use other Internet sources and research the general market situation in the respective industry and the individual situation of the company in question.

On the one hand, this makes the work of HR departments easier because they are dealing with well-prepared counterparts. On the other hand, they are aware of their strong position and are quite demanding when it comes to salary, work-life balance, and benefits, for example. Also possible: You ask critical questions. So some people dig deeper in the interview and want to know why a vacancy has become available. Companies have to adapt to this.

What is required is transparent and appreciative communication with applicants. This means not just treating candidates as “numbers”, but treating them as people with individual needs and treating them with respect. In the ongoing war for talent, and appreciative, professional approach to applicants is required. Today, being professional means responding to the candidate both factually and emotionally and, for example, enticing passive candidates into the company by addressing them directly.

Ultimately, it is about the following causal chain: Better applicant communication leads to a better candidate experience and a better image as an employer. This can be crucial in the decision of professionals for a position in your company.

The right attitude is so important

A prerequisite for up-to-date applicant communication is a rethinking in the HR departments. Those who work there must be aware that soft skills such as empathy are more important to them today than ever before. All executives should be (or become) convinced of this.

The common goal must be…

• to attract the attention of professionals.
• meet professionals in partnership.
• Support professionals throughout the application process.

Dealing with applicants: Be open and transparent

The appreciative communication with applicants begins with the formulation of your job advertisement, your presentation as a company on online career pages, and your (digital) exchange with the candidates. Supposed little things often play a big role. A message in the style of a mass email (and without a personal address) about the receipt of an application can already deter some applicants. Promising employees may even withdraw their applications. This can be a missed opportunity for the company. And it may also lead to negative comments and reviews on social media channels.

To avoid this, you should observe the following basic rules when dealing with applicants :

• Confirm receipt of an application as soon as possible.
• If there are delays during processing, please let us know.
• If you have questions or are unclear about certain points in the application, it is better to clarify them directly instead of possibly drawing the wrong conclusions from them.
• If candidates make it to the next round or shortlist, then inform them about the next steps.
• In particular, do not write refusals according to a formula. Try to formulate them personally and forgivingly. You may create different templates for this purpose that do not sound like the usual phrases.

As an HR manager, it is best if you put yourself in the position of the job seeker. Think about what questions they might have.

Job ad:

• What are the key responsibilities of the position?
• Is it more of an operational or conceptual/strategic activity?
• where is the place of work; e.g. B. inside or outside a city?
• Which tools and other work equipment are important?
• What does the immediate environment (colleagues, business partners and customers) look like?

Career Pages:

• What type of application is desired (by e-mail or application portal)?
• Who is the addressee of the application?
• Which papers and documents are expected? Can missing ones be handed in later?
• What happens after receipt of the application?

Invitation for an interview:

• What is the best way to reach the place of the interview?
• Are travel expenses covered?
• Is there a specific dress code?
• Who are the interlocutors? Are there potential team members among them?
• What are the key issues?
• Will the future workplace be shown?
• How long is the appointment?

As I said: treating applicants with respect is also about objectivity. But that doesn’t mean being stiff. Instead, keep your ads, emails, or letters more casual. Ideally, you express yourself as if you would not write to the applicants, but rather have a friendly conversation with them. This reduces the distance, takes away any fears, and creates a certain trust. In addition to designing career pages and job advertisements, a similar approach is also recommended for your communication via social media channels, by e-mail or letter, and for telephone calls.

A digital applicant management system can be a helpful tool here. Depending on the variant, it supports HR managers, among other things, in …

• to accept applications.
• to assess candidates.
• meeting dates and deadlines.
• Store and analyze applicant data.
• Formulate and publish job advertisements.
• to manage contacts.

This has consequences: Errors in applicant communication

So companies have to pay more attention to applicants. If they don’t do this and also make typical mistakes in recruiting, this can have unpleasant consequences in the long run:

• The number of applicants is falling.
• It takes longer to fill vacancies.
• Recruiting costs are increasing.
• The image as an employer suffers.

If you notice these or comparable developments, you should take countermeasures in the manner described above. It also helps to avoid the following common mistakes:

• Do not respond to receipt of an application.
• Keep postponing announced deadlines and putting applicants off.
• Confusing or incorrectly formulating salutations and names.
• Not answering questions from candidates.
• Enter wrong contact persons.
• Do not send cancellations.

Remember: In the current situation of a shortage of skilled workers, it cannot be taken for granted that someone will be interested in your company and want to work for you. And even if you don’t get a chance this time, you could be a good fit for an open position in the future. Therefore, she or he should keep you in good memory.

We would be happy to support you in your search for suitable new employees. If you wish, we can make a pre-selection for you and present you with good candidates at short notice. Simply send us your personnel request – we will get back to you as soon as possible.

turned out to be a difficult year, and that is why a social project was launched on the Web, to which everyone is invited to join. To do this, you need a little: go to the site, click on the button and yell. What’s up, Iceland? Now let’s explain.

Cry therapy has been known to everyone for a very long time: it helps to throw out stress and negativity, reduce anxiety and escape from internal tension. This is what Promote Iceland decided to use and launched a website where anyone can record their cry and send it to Iceland.

Cry therapy has been known to everyone for a very long time: it helps to throw out stress and negativity, reduce anxiety and escape from internal tension. This is what Promote Iceland decided to use and launched a website where anyone can record their cry and send it to Iceland.

How it works?

Everything is pretty simple:

1. Go to the project website using this link .
2. Choose the location where you want to scream. While this article is being written, several locations are available: Djupivogur (East Iceland), Festarfjall (Reykjanes, Iceland), Skogarfoss (South Iceland), Snaefellsjokull in West Iceland, Videy (Reykjavik, Iceland), Raudasandur (Vestfjord, Iceland). Kalfshamarsvik in North Iceland is not yet online.
3. Click on the big and round yellow button.
4. Scream or talk, you can even whisper.
5. Send a shout.
6. It will play in the selected location.
7. ?????
8. PROFIT!

What does the psychologist say?

The site also features a message from Zoë Aston, a therapist, and mental health consultant. She says it’s a very beneficial way to vent negativity, and what’s more, it’s natural to yell:

“Part of the beneficial effect of screaming comes from the ability to make a loud noise in a wide, open, still space. It literally allows your amygdala to release the tension built up there and move forward.”

She also gave advice on proper shouting to make the session more productive:

1. Think about what your cry will be. Some people yell, some use words or even breath.
2. Stand up, spread your legs shoulder-width apart, slightly bending your knees. Relax your shoulders and you can put your hands on your hips or on your stomach.
3. Imagine a child who is screaming. The scream must come from within.
4. Take a few deep breaths before you start.

But the main advice is to definitely turn to a professional if you really need professional help.

Also on the site, there is a video with the best “shouts”, which were recorded by other netizens and sent to Iceland.

By the way, on our website we have some useful materials on this topic, which can also help you cope with stress, anxiety, or just emotional burnout:

• 5 unexpected reasons to love stress

• Stress tips that really work

• How to get out of stress with minimal losses?

• How to quickly relieve stress: 7 ways to relax

• 6 tips to improve stress tolerance at work

Break in on Friday and have fun, today is a wonderful day to shout at Iceland and relax with friends.

Sometimes it is difficult for children to integrate into society and feel full and confident there. At such moments, parental support is important for the child, otherwise, he will independently begin to look for comfortable conditions of stay, which will not always benefit him.

Parents, on the other hand, not noticing the problems of their child in communicating with peers in time, can doom him to alienation and being in the status of a “white crow”. Often, pressing everyday problems and constant workloads just contribute to the fact that adults simply do not notice how their child suffers and is in a stressful state.

In such cases, children, having not received the necessary support from loved ones, begin to look for it in other manifestations – sometimes even in subcultures. This is what happened in the Pikuz family. 12-year-old Olya, not finding contact with either her mother or her classmates, became informal. In search of herself and a suitable company, she tried a lot – in a year she managed to be a fascist, skinhead, emo, goth. The girl has become absolutely uncontrollable and aggressive – she does not listen to her mother, screams, and swears.

46-year-old Alla is unable to cope with her daughter – the woman turned to the program “Honey, we are killing children” on the STB channel for help. The psychologists of the project managed to get to the bottom of the problem. It turned out that at some point, classmates began to mock Olya. Then the girl really needed the support of her mother, but Alla simply did not hear her …

Will mother and daughter be able to understand each other again? What frightening forecast for the future of Olya will be voiced by the psychologist and host of the program Dmitry Karpachev? Watch today’s episode of the program “Honey, we are killing children” at 22:35 on STB.

We all know very well that the knife must be held in the right hand, and the fork in the left, and that it is impossible to come to visit without a call. But the rules of good manners are not limited to this. 

We talk about the rules of modern etiquette that will help you always be on top and avoid embarrassing situations. We are sure that something from our list will surprise you!

1. Don’t say you’re on a diet and don’t drink alcohol.

Talking at the table that you are on a diet and that you “can’t do all this” is a bad form. It is especially ugly to refuse the offered dishes at a party under this pretext. Be sure to praise the culinary talents of the hostess, while the food on the plate can remain untouched. The same should be done with alcohol. There is no need to tell everyone why you can not or do not want to drink. Order a dry white wine and just sip a little.

2. Sushi umbrella correctly

When you enter a room with a wet umbrella, do you immediately open it to dry it? According to the rules of etiquette, this is not allowed. After all, it creates inconvenience for everyone else. The umbrella must be folded (but not twisted) and placed on the umbrella stand. If there is no stand, you can lean the umbrella against the wall.

3. Put your bag on the floor

We are accustomed to holding a bag on our laps or putting it on a chair that stands nearby. Meanwhile, this is contrary to the rules of etiquette. Bags must be hung on the back of the chair on which you are sitting, or placed on

4. Be careful with perfume

In no case should you overdo it with perfume and toilet water, especially in the theater, at a concert, in a hospital, restaurant, at an exhibition, or social reception? The rule here is simple: if by the evening you can still smell the aroma of your perfume, you can be sure that everyone else has already suffocated.

the floor, where they definitely will not interfere with anyone. A small clutch can be placed on the table next to you. By the way, in Europe, everyone has been doing just that for a long time.

5. For a video conference, choose business images

Lockdown dictates new rules for business negotiations. For the next call with work colleagues, choose adequate clothes, but not frankly homemade or pajamas in general. If you have an important videoconference or a meeting with management, put on a shirt, jumper, or turtleneck – clothes that would be suitable for the office.

6. Eat Sushi Properly

Don’t like or don’t know how to use chopsticks for sushi? Well, at home you can afford to eat sushi with a fork or even with your hands. But in a restaurant, you still need to use only chopsticks. And never lick your sushi chopsticks – that’s unacceptable!

7. Don’t abuse audio messages

Send audio messages only to people you know well. Many of them have a very ambiguous attitude. You should not send them to colleagues, clients, and even housemates. It may not be possible for a person to listen to an audio message, and in general, it is considered unethical.

8. Don’t keep your smartphone on the table

If during a meeting with friends or a business lunch your phone lies in front of you, and besides, you are constantly distracted by it to scroll the feed or take a picture of food, then your interlocutors are completely uninteresting to you and you clearly demonstrate this.

9. Don’t fix other people’s social media mistakes

Only a few shine with impeccable literacy today. But correcting mistakes in other people’s posts or Stories is the height of bad manners. So you demonstrate your narcissism and elementary disrespect for a person. In addition, this is a sign of interference in the personal territory of the individual.

10. Don’t use shopping bags

Cellophane bags are allowed only upon returning from the supermarket, the same applies to branded bags with the names of fashion brands. Carrying them with you later as a bag is just redneck. For a lot of things, use a fabric shopper or a large bag.

When choosing a course to become a psychological counselor, it is worth paying attention to the details and recommendations of independent specialist institutions.

The Essentials in Brief

• The job title “Psychological Counselor” is not protected. Therefore, there is a large variance in the training in terms of duration, price and quality.
• There is a certificate from the Chamber of Industry and Commerce for the completion of the further training “Psychological Counselor (IHK)”, not the state-recognized Chamber of Industry and Commerce professional qualification.
• When choosing a course to become a psychological counselor, it is worth paying attention to the details and recommendations of independent specialist institutions.

In Germany, anyone can theoretically call themselves a psychological counselor. The professional title is not protected – and that has consequences: Training as a psychological counselor is therefore not regulated by the state and varies greatly in quality, depth, duration, and price. They also do not bring a state-recognized professional qualification certificate.

This is important to note. Because during further training to become a “Psychological Advisor (IHK)” from the Chamber of Industry and Commerce, you could quickly come up with this idea. After all, the public body representing the interests of all commercial companies in Germany awards the so-called IHK degrees for legally recognized training occupations. But the IHK certificate that comes at the end of further training to become a “Psychological Advisor (IHK)” has nothing to do with these qualifications.

Is there training as a psychological counselor at the Chamber of Industry and Commerce?

No, there isn’t in that sense. The psychological counselor with an IHK certificate is not an IHK training course, as there is for other legally recognized professions, but it is a non-state-regulated course that is offered by private providers in cooperation with the IHK. And in the end, with a certain participation rate, you usually receive an IHK certificate. This is not to be confused with an IHK test certificate, which you receive according to the Vocational Training Act (BBiG) after completing the test for a training occupation.

How recognized is the IHK certificate for psychological counselors?

You do not only receive an IHK certificate after completing a course to become a psychological counselor, it is available for numerous seminars/courses that are not state-regulated. The range of seminars offered by the IHK is very extensive and can be viewed on the website wis.ihk.de. Currently (as of November 2021) you can find over 86,000 entries under the search term “IHK certificate”. So there are numerous different seminars that advertise with an IHK certificate. Everyone has to decide for themselves whether this is actually a seal of quality for psychological counselors.

A problem that people who are interested in further training as a psychological counselor encounter: Unfortunately, there are quite dubious or qualitatively insufficient courses on the market. Getting to a course that is too short, incomplete in content, or too expensive – even a promised IHK certificate does not protect against this. Especially in a job like that of a psychological counselor, which primarily deals with sensitive issues and personal problems of the clients, it is important to strive for a well-rounded education.

That means taking a close look at the course structure and the content taught. 

It is also worthwhile to consult independent training tests and certifications of the courses and to compare the offers with each other.

What alternatives to the IHK are there?

Even if the certificate from the Chamber of Industry and Commerce has little significance: there are definitely indications and seals of approval that say something about the quality of further training to become a psychological counselor. This includes cooperation, certification, or recommendations from professional associations. For example, the training center for therapeutic professions (btb.info), which also offers training for psychological counselors, cooperates with the German Society for Health and Prevention (DGGP). This training is also certified by the State Central Office for Distance Learning and tested by the Fachverein Quallianz eV.

Frequently asked questions about the training ” Psychological Counselor”

Is Psychological Counseling a recognized profession?

No, everyone in Germany can call themselves a psychological consultant, it is not a protected professional title. Accordingly, training to become a psychological counselor is not regulated by law.

How much does a training course to become a psychological counselor cost?

Total costs of around 1,300 to 3,000 euros must be expected for training as a psychological counselor, which means around 75 to 250 euros a month.

How long does a training course to become a psychological counselor take?

Approximately one to one and a half years must be allowed for the training. If the standard period of study is exceeded, a few months can usually be added free of charge.